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In the post “Session Splash – May 26, 2009 Part 1*” I mention two letters that I wanted to write to a former client. I wrote the first of these two in the post “Angry Fuck’in Therapeutic Letter to Former Client Part 1**”. Please read those posts for background if you would like.
Since writing the angry letter in Part 1 I have almost completely forgotten about this client. I have not yet replaced the work I lost, but I am 75% of the way there, which helps me to let go. I also do not feel angry at him anymore, and have let go of all the negative emotions associated with the situation. For these reasons I did not feel it was necessary to write a second letter at all. And no surprise, but he never contacted me to come back to work at the end of last month.
The reason I say I have almost completely forgotten about him is because while I have let go of the negative feelings, I do not want to forget the lessons that I learned from this experience. I feel I learned, or starting working on ways:
- To trust my gut instinct when someone feels “off” to me
- To respect myself enough to set and honor my own boundaries
- To find ways to express my anger in an effort to let it go
- To healthfully express my anger to those I am angry with directly, but with respect
- I can not change, or help change, those who do not want to change themselves
I have used this experience to further my confrontation skills, such as with my roommates. It is still a nerve racking process for me, with many panic attacks along the journey, but I am getting there and not giving up.